Happy New Year from Kuwait

So I finally got some new userpics. This one isn’t from Kuwait, but it’s middle eastern anyway (Egypt). Uploaded a couple more that I’ll use as time goes on. Hope someone enjoys them. (does anyone still read this?!?)

I had every intention of writing something more to do with the holidays. I wound up with plenty of other things to do, though. It seems while I’m home I’m just too busy to sit still for a moment and think… and write…

So here I am in Kuwait with plenty of time to sit and think and write and sleep and sit more and… not go anywhere because I don’t want to get kidnapped and beheaded or shot or whatever. Which makes me wonder why I’m even here. During the ‘war’ (as if it’s not still going on), we didn’t stay here at all. But after it was all over (ha!) we came back, mainly because it’s cheaper than making an extra stop and rotating crews through. I guess we know what we’re worth now…

But enough about that… what’s really important? I figured with a New Year here, it might be a good time to take a step back and ponder. The old ‘God, Family, Country’ thing comes to mind and I thought I’d explore it just a bit. Is that what’s important? Are those good priorities?

Why God first? As far as I can tell, humans are unique in that they’re the only soulful physical beings on the planet. Some people don’t believe we’re soulful, or unique. But many people (I dare say most) do. That’s not just confined to the Christian world, either. The implication is, pardon the cliche, larger than life. I suppose that scares some people, and rightly so. The soul is the part of us that relates to that which exists outside the confines of the world we experience (our 3 1/2 dimensions of space and time). If, in fact, we do possess this ‘soul’ thing, that begs us to discover what it can relate to… most often called god (God, gods, etc.). As the soul is most often thought (certainly taught by Christians) to exist beyond the life of the physical body, the ramifications of our relationship to God are, indeed most profound… more than anything else in life. God first.

Why Family second? Family is unique as people go. Specifically, spouses, parents and children are a one-of-a-kind relationship that goes beyond intimate. Though I don’t profess to know all the details about the conception of a soul, the result of the creation of a child is a brand new physical soulful being. Spouses, parents and children are unique in that only they share that bond which exists both physically and soulfully. Of course, siblings, cousins, etc. all share that bond in a way (though removed one or more steps). And, if diluted enough, we presumably *all* share that bond. But immediate family is the closest ‘touchable’ thing to any person, physically or spiritually. Family second.

Why Country third? First off, let’s take a look at something notably missing from the list: Self. I’ll get to that later. For now, we must figure out, is Country a good third? There are other candidates like job, recreation, education, and so on. If you look carefully, though, you’ll see this list is about people. It’s not about things, or activities, it’s about people and our relationship to them. The ‘other’ things fit into the people category one way or another (including Self which hasn’t even been addressed yet). I propose, though, that there is another classification of people that can include Country, but is more comprehensive and correct to put in third place: Community.

Why Community third? Countries are geographically based Communities. Communities can be geographically based, as in neighborhoods, towns, and states. But they can also defy geographical bounds, being centered around other things like ideas, people, jobs, recreation, friendship, and lots of other things. Country is a special kind of community which requires attention because it can dramatically affect the health of the other communities we participate in (think Christians in Saudi Arabia). But I dare say it would be foolish to defend Country if it attacks those Communities that are closer or more important to us. Community is the next logical step after Family. Community third, and prioritized by those which are of greatest impact (to us and/or others). Country fits in there somewhere…

But what about Self? These days, the concept of self is ingrained in us. Maslow lists self-actualization as the highest need. “Have it your way, right away” “Be all that you can be” The appeal to the sense of self is relentless. In fact, Christianity acknowledges the sense of self. “… so that whoever believes in Him will have everlasting life.” (John 3:16) Who wouldn’t want that?

I believe, though, that we’ve made a grave error in going so far as to verbalize the ‘self first’ mantra and teach it to our children in the way we do these days. Self first isn’t just a nifty idea, it’s an inescapable and timeless fact of life. Emphasizing selfishness is about as silly as emphasizing breathing. It’s not just important, it’s the way we are.

The problem is, the current ‘selfish’ mantra gives little or no consideration to, as Plato put it, the art of measurement. The focus is on the pleasure right now, which appears huge. It’s easy to be overcome by the “just do it” idea that you can soak in pleasure now worry about the (potentially painful) consequences later. Christians in America have adopted this view as evidenced by, if nothing else, the minimal difference in divorce rate between Christians and non-Christians. In fact, though I presume to understand this concept, I, too, sometimes fall prey to that line of reasoning and am painfully aware of that problem. But the true benefit to self comes when we live in the way that brings the greatest net benefit to us, without respect to time. Think about that for a few momements…

Truth be known, I believe all people, all the time, persistently seek that which they believe brings the greatest benefit to themselves. Mother Theresa did. Scott Peterson did, too. Clearly, they measured differently. The priorities listed above exclude self, I believe, because living according to them *is* self actualizing in the truest sense. The difference between Mother Theresa and Scott Peterson is their view of time. That’s why God comes first (if the soul lives on, our ‘here and now’ system of measurement is worse than foolish). The logical flow from closest to most distant is simply a practical application of Christ’s ‘second greatest commandment’ – loving people (the Golden Rule, etc. etc.). Note that those who are relationally closer, both in terms of intensity and longevity, come first. We have the greatest impact on them and they on us.

And as we travel down the list, our service or attention to each has to be a service or benefit to those above. I defend my country (these days primarily against its own government) out of love for my communities, family, and God. I even sometimes extend my impact (as I’m able) to those in the ‘whole world’ community. All of these benefit me in the ‘eternal’ run.

Now, as I continue to refine my understanding of priorities, I only hope I can live by them more often. It’s very tempting to sacrifice family for community, or community for country, or country for world (think UN v.s. US). What we *do* should flow from our priorities, and these are mine. My goal for 2005 is, quite simply, to do a better job living by them.

God first.
Family second.
Community third.

V-